Street Style

NBA Franchise Catch-up

If you’re even a mildly-serious hoops fan, you’d surely agree with me that the golden era of the NBA was the 80s to early 90s. Close your eyes for a moment and it’s easy to drift back to a time when Spud Webb was winning dunk comps, Craig Ehlo was repeatedly made a fool of by a rampant Michael Jordan, and Kurt Rambis was being clotheslined by the ghoulish Kevin McHale 

So if, like me, you’ve let your attention slip in the last few years as the decade-long Carfino/Woods dynasty was usurped by a cashed up Fox Sports, you might be surprised to learn that there are a few new teams out there, some of which have stupid names and others which you’ve never heard of.

Why not begin with the Charlotte Bobcats? You mean Larry Johnson and the Hornets aren’t around anymore? That’s right! But they still exist as the New Orleans Hornets. So the Bobcats moved into Charlotte instead and that city was finally blessed with one of those lame sporting logos with an animal all stretched out so it looks tough/fast. You know the ones.

But back to the Hornets. Can’t New Orleans just call themselves the Jazz like they used to in the 70s? No, because that’s what Utah are now and you don’t want to make The Mailman angry. So what about when Hurricane Katrina hit and New Orleans was all trashed? Oh, they just moved the team to Oklahoma for two years and called them the Oklahoma City Hornets. Pity all the kids who rushed out to get Chris Paul jerseys only to have the team moved back to Louisiana after two seasons.

Well, I guess that’s the end of pro ball in Oklahoma city for a while. Unless … hang on … the Seattle Supersonics owner had a dispute with the city of Seattle and the Sonics now don’t exist? What about Shawn Kemp and Gary Peyton? Irrelevant - they both retired years ago. Ahh. So, what happened to that franchise? Well, it relocated to … Oklahoma City and called itself the Thunder. Why would anyone bother supporting one of these teams? Cause it’s pretty much just a matter of time until some oil billionaire buys you out and you have to move to Calgary to see your team play.

But there’s no need to be cynical, because if there’s one thing you can set your watch by it’s the Vancouver Grizzlies, shoring up the place of basketball in Canada, playing with panache, entertaining crowds of … sorry? Yeah, they don’t exist anymore either. In 2001 their license was just bought by some guy in Memphis (that’s apparently how easy it is) and off they went to another city.

If all that makes your head spin, don’t despair. The history of basketball in the US is littered with examples of teams dying, relocating or changing names. Pittsburgh Ironmen, anyone? Sheboygan Redskins? Fort Wayne Pistons? So put your feet up and embrace the changes. Enjoy watching fine athletes in all their glory, running the court on a fast break and finishing with a menacing dunk.

If only Kevin McHale was there to stop them …