Street Style

This is my review of how I will be conducting reviews. Probably most importantly, there will be no scoring. Scoring doesn’t work. You can’t apply a number to this shit. It doesn’t make sense. Oh, this record gets 18/20 because dudes on the cover have seen a General Pants catalogue. Whatevz. I can not be bothered with that. What you will be getting is an insightful exploration into funny gossip about whoever made the record. Let’s face it, no one cares about music anymore… we just want to hear about who the artist is sleeping with / what drugs they are doing. Sure, there are exceptions to this rule (Little River Band, Neil Young, Sonic Youth, anyone that has stood in the same room as Brian Eno) but they are so limited that I’d rather pretend they don’t exist. For instance, if we were to look at the current MGMT single “Kids” my review would go something like this..:

“Two dudes that live in Williamsburg that look like every other dude that lives in Williamsburg that can now afford way better drugs than you because a major label gave them shit tonne’s of money and the drugs are way cheaper in New York than Sydney. Anyway they wrote a song called Kids and it seems OK but I would probably rather look at pictures of the girls these dudes are sleeping with than listen to this. Having said that, song is a bit of a jam. I’d definitely download it illegally.”

I have to write 400 words though so I will probably actually do some sort of research on the band / artist. There is also a pretty good chance I will just make heaps of stuff up. Oh, and one last thing; if you don’t agree with something I say, I don’t really care because it just means you’re wrong. Please feel free to tell me what you think though and I love getting opinions on new music… it’s all just soooo great. I’m hanging to hear about how good the new Kings of Leon record is dude bra. Do you and the rest of the bra’s love it? Thought so.

MGMT crowd photo by Pam Cantú